1. Stop your activities. One of the best ways to calm yourself down when you feel stressed is to stop interacting with the stressor (if possible). Sometimes, pausing for a few seconds before you return to dealing with the problem is effective enough to make you calmer.

• Try counting to ten, or taking three to five deep breaths, before you respond to a heated conversation or situation.

• Take a short break. For example, if your argument with your partner is getting heated, stop fighting and ask permission to "walk away" for a moment by saying, "I feel quite overwhelmed right now. I need to take a break for fifteen minutes before we get back to talking about this matter. " Go somewhere else, focus on deep breathing, and say a calming mantra, such as “I can handle it in peace. I can do it."


2. Focus your thoughts on your five senses. When feeling stressed, the body sometimes interprets the perceived pressure as an attack and puts us in a "fighting mode" (the body is as if prepared to fight). This situation triggers the release of hormones such as adrenaline which can narrow blood vessels, speed up (and shorten) breathing, and increase heart rate. Over time, your brain will become accustomed to this panic response. This is also known as automatic reactivity.

• By trying to be calmer, doing things slowly and focusing on the individual physical responses your body is showing you, you can tell how your body feels when you feel really stressed. Several studies have shown that conscious attention to what is happening to the body helps retrain the brain for habitual or automatic responses.

• Pay attention to the sensations you feel in your body, but try not to judge them or judge them negatively. For example, if you are worried that you won't do well on your final exam, you can pay attention to how your body feels and tell yourself. You can say, "My face is red and hot, my heart is beating really fast, my palms are sweaty, and I feel nauseous." Try to keep these things as neutral as possible, without any negative judgment (eg, you feel irritated or angry because your palms are sweaty).


3. Breathe deeply. When the body enters "fighting mode", the sympathetic nervous system can interfere with your breathing. You may find it difficult to breathe when you feel stressed, but it is important to stay focused on deep, well-balanced breathing. This helps return oxygen to the body and reduces the level of lactate in the bloodstream so you can feel calmer.

• You may notice that when you feel stressed or angry, your breath seems to be coming out of the top of your chest, even from your throat. Try to breathe from your diaphragm. Place one hand on the lower part of the stomach (just below the ribs) and the other hand on the chest.

• Inhale slowly through your nose. Try to take a count of four breaths if you can. Feel your stomach push forward as you inhale. This is abdominal or diaphragmatic breathing.

• Hold your breath for one to two seconds. After that, exhale slowly through your nose or mouth. Try to take it out for a count of four. Repeat the breathing process six to ten times per minute for a few minutes.

• You can also recite a 'mantra' while you breathe, or count your breaths so you don't get distracted. The mantra used can be a single syllable, such as "hmm", or a phrase, such as "inhale [inhaling], exhale [exhaling]".


4. Try to relax the muscles of the body. When you feel stressed, you may unconsciously tighten and tense the muscles of the body so that you become more stressed and tense. With progressive muscle relaxation techniques, you can release tension and feel calmer and more relaxed. These relaxation techniques focus on consciously tensing and relaxing the muscles (based on the group of limbs).

• There are several guidelines for progressive muscle relaxation techniques available online. For example, the University of Berkeley uploads technical manuscripts or scripts that you can follow. In addition, the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) has uploaded a tutorial on progressive muscle relaxation techniques in the form of an eleven-minute sound file that you can access for free.

• Find a quiet and comfortable place if possible. If not, you can still do this relaxation anywhere.

• Loosen tight clothing whenever possible. Sit quietly or lie down (be careful because lying down you can feel comfortable and maybe fall asleep!). Breathe in a steady rhythm while relaxing.


Start with the facial muscles as usually, people experience muscle tension in the face, neck and shoulders. Open your eyes wide for five seconds, then relax. Close your eyes tightly for five seconds, then relax. For ten seconds, pay attention to the sensations that the parts feel.

• Switch to other facial muscle groups. Tightly close your lips for five seconds, then release. Smile as wide as you can for five seconds, then let go. Again, make sure you enjoy the sensation of the relaxation for ten seconds before moving on to relaxing other muscle groups.

• Continue to stretch the other muscle groups for five seconds, then relax. Pause for 10 seconds between stretching muscle groups.

• If there is enough time, continue relaxation with the other muscle groups: neck, shoulders, arms, chest, stomach, buttocks, thighs, calves, feet and toes.

• If you don't have time to do progressive muscle relaxation of the whole body, try relaxing the facial muscles. You can also try massaging the hands briefly because we often experience tension in the hands.

In general, what we see, many forget in a calm, relaxed way. Thus, will be rushed in dealing with problems. With the five senses, as much as possible to relax the muscles and five senses in balance.

Relaxing is a comfortable and serene situation, so that our souls feel as if they are floating carefree.

By relaxing means there is nothing to worry about. You become at ease with your job, your duties, and your obligations. And most importantly, it is comfortable for your physical and mental health.

Relaxation is a way to achieve a relaxed situation. Each person has their own way to relax themselves. No matter how simple it is, as long as it can make your soul free from the shackles, it means relaxation. In fact, the simpler the method, the more effective it will be.

Through relaxation, you will not only avoid the stresses and stresses of life, but will also make you more productive and confident. Relaxation allows you to remove the burdens on your back, and makes your steps lighter.

The steps towards relaxation that you can try to do are as follows:

1. Avoid tension, get closer to God

Many people do relaxation while still carrying a psychological burden on their shoulders. Let go of that burden, you don't need to be escapist to avoid tension. This means that you don't have to feel ashamed of your problems, no matter how bad they are. Everyone has problems, and admit that some people have more problems than you.

If your problem is serious, try to think about the possibilities of a new problem that is much more serious. Then you will feel grateful. Gratitude is the mainstay of therapy for releasing all burdens from your shoulders.

2. Know your problem, solve it with the right person

If you know exactly what the problem is that is bugging you, then you will quickly know the source of your tension. That way, you also know how to deal with it. Try to look at the problem correctly, in proportion.

Don't beat yourself up too much for your failure, just as you shouldn't praise yourself when you experience a success.

Don't exaggerate a problem, but also don't downplay it.

Do not cover up a problem, but also do not sell it off by talking about the problem to everyone. Talk about your problem with the right person who can help solve your problem. Look at the problem in proportion, and you won't spend too much energy dealing with it.

3. Solve your problems one by one

While trying to solve a problem, at the same time do not think about other problems that you are also facing. Face it one by one, sort by priority scale. It is better for you to face the problems that are real in front of you first so that they do not overwhelm you psychologically.

4. Create a comfortable room atmosphere

The room affects our mood. If we already have problems, then go home to a messy room, then our life will feel more and more like tangled threads. Make your room as comfortable as possible. Especially the bedroom because there we recharge our energy & thoughts. Plus aromatherapy can make you more relaxed.

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